Monday, February 11, 2008

Clarification...

I was not trying to say that there is something "safe" or "boring" about having kids and a family. And I completely agree that children are a bold and terrifying and radical thing to bring into one's life. And - as I have said time and again in this blog and out loud - mother's have all my awe for the responsibility they carry and the lifestyle they endure daily.

What I was trying to say - was that most people will not criticize someone who takes on that lifestyle. It is considered socially acceptable, and in fact - in America, is considered the ideal to strive for.

I do not think it is a lesser choice. I only meant to say - that it is not the only choice; and that, in my experience - people have been really critical of my choices, whenever in life I have deviated from the standard.

I also will agree that I invite this criticism by asking for advice. And that YES - I tend to absorb the negative from advice given because I'm an anxious kindof person -- That in fact, was the whole point of my post.

Realizing this - I only meant that I think I need to stop absorbing all of that doubt, and feel more confident in my decisions - since I'm in the best position to know what I'm capable of, and what would make me happy. Other people can only tell me what they experienced.

Advice is good. Counsel is good - but I tend to let other people's warnings, advice, criticism, or anxiety - talk me out of doing things that I know I can do.

I will also say, that this was not directed towards my family particularly (other than the comment about pride - which was a reference to something a family member said). And in fact - this really didn't have much to do with just the self-employment. It's just something I've been running into from a lot of different sources on a lot of different issues - that I didn't write about here, because I didn't want to invite further criticism.

I'm sorry if I offended anyone. I love my family. I respect you all greatly, especially my sister Mary, who is not only a mother - but a business owner, and general all-star.

And I appreciate the advice that I solicit from you all. I'm just trying to learn to be more confident in myself, and make decisions a little more independently.

Love, amy

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