Sunday, July 01, 2007

Tonight I am a sentimental mess.

The realization of change is starting to settle on me. Huge waves of change. Change that is good and healthy and even exciting, but it has me teary-eyed and sorrowful. I am mourning a future loss.

I am walking away from a city I've poured my sweat, blood, tears, self into; Walking away from people who have changed my life with their passion, idealism, and commitment; walking away from an era of my life.

Kenda is leaving. I will be living near my family for the first time in 7 years. I'm going to have a job and a life, and they will be separate things. I'm probably not going to be confronted directly with a huge social injustice on a daily basis anymore. I won't live, think and breathe New Orleans and Katrina every hour of every day.

Why is change so hard? Even when you know it's good...

I guess because change usually involves a loss. And even if you're gaining something better-- like sanity, and better relationships with the people you care for, and time to think and breathe, --the loss still stings.

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

loosing a large malignancy to a skilled surgeon leaves a pretty good sting tool

Anonymous said...

the only way out of WW1 or WW2 was to be killed or to win.....today we believe there is an effective tour of duty that allows each of us to have a maximum impact on problems that can not be solved by one person.